| new lj |
[29 Nov 2005|02:41am] |
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new lj ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) oregonchronical
it's freinds only but add me or post comment and i'll nprobably add you back
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[12 Nov 2005|12:12pm] |
starting a new lj when i move. yes i'm moving. yes alex and i are staying together. i'm leaving the first weekend of december. don't know when i'll be back but plan on visiting often.
p.s. lj's gotten spiffy.. whoah.
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[28 Jul 2005|01:10pm] |
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I hate it when your almost full pack of smokes dissappears and you don't know what happened to them or perhaps who took them.
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| to someone who doesn't read this anymore but i cna't really actually give this to you |
[03 Jul 2005|12:17am] |
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I have everything and nothing to say to you. It's kinda funny. i check in on you. I check in on countless people that are no longer in my life. I think it's because no one stays for long so i check in to know that yes they exist... yes they were there. yes i didn't make the whole thing up. but that's besides the point. i wanted to thank you. with out you, without everythign that happened i wouldn't be who i am now and have the happiness that i cherish more than anything. So thank you. You taught me alot about myself. You were the proving ground. and i passed. At least i think i did which is all that really matters right? i wish you nothing but happiness even if i don't think i coudl ever truely understand what you believe is happiness.. We're very different in that i think. but that doesn't matter. i guess i wanted to finally forgive but not forget. i was trying to forget but couldn't forgive. and don't think that i think i didn't do anything wrong. i know alot of what i did wrong. i wasn't without fault. but i wanted to escape the pain... the scars that were justified. the scars that i've finally been able to move past. so anyway. thank you. and yes this was just for me and i'm almost completely sure you don't care so you don't need to tell me. good luck.
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| and on a completely different note... |
[03 Jul 2005|12:05am] |
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still an emotional masochist... sometimes when i'm disgustingly happy... sickeningly retardedly blissful... i gotta go check in on something that destroyed me somehow. i shoudl really stop that.
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| bizarrely normal |
[30 Jun 2005|04:37pm] |
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mood |
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life is so.... normal... it's fun. i need ta get money tho.. i have so many sewing ideas and stuff... stuff to just make and maybe sell on ebay or something.. but just to create.. some of course will be for me... i have so many ideas and projects and things running around my head it so awesome. so incredibly rocking... and the best part is.. they may actually happen...
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[22 Jun 2005|06:33pm] |
life is life is life. best way to put it.
You Are Absinthe!
 You have a unique personality. Although most like you, sometimes you take some getting used to. You can be a bit strong. You are full of energy and sometimes flamboyant. You are the life of the party but if people are not careful you can knock them on their ass.What Naughty My Little Pony Are You?
busy planning lots of things which is how i like to be.
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| welcome to my life |
[10 Jun 2005|08:42pm] |
i'm scared right now... i'm oddly alone... probably my fault... i hermit up... and when i do.. i don't bounce out of it like others do... oh well it'll happen eventually. i rpomise i'm not avoiding people... if ya wanna hang out call m eand snatch me up.
i have choices to make things to do and i'm doing them.. just maybe not as quickly as i should. but it'll get down and everything will be ok. I promised myself. maybe i'm too much of an optimist but life has always shown me that if i believe that i can well i pull it off... somehow.. sounds corny right? *shrug* mybe my life is corny. i think it is.
Alex is being truely wonderful. I never imagined we coudl ever be this happy. I never imagined..... ah nevermind.
i have to start thinking of packing my stuff up. the one cloud that hangs over my world.
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[01 Jun 2005|01:13pm] |
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i've been really crazy lately.. uber mood swings... poor alex has been getting the brunt of it... he's so sweet. and patient... if i'm crazy it's not my fault... i blame the depo.
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[01 Jun 2005|12:58pm] |
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i gots me a cellamaphone... 530 383 1061 i prefer text messages.. it's a prepaod cell and they are cheaper
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| dear livejournal, |
[31 May 2005|12:10pm] |
i have the bestest boyfriend ever, a crazy mom, not enough sleep and.... MY COMPUTER!!!! stupid not being home in like 2 weeks.
stupid having to be home now.
stupid heat.
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| sometimes all i need is a good push |
[24 May 2005|04:06pm] |
go on and get the lighter
we're gonna start the fire
my god i love gwen even if she is a stoner.
i'm so excited for this weekend... i got an email from my ness!!! well she isn't my ness anymore but shhhh i can pretend... *bounces* my god i've missed her so much.. i'm thinking about skipping fri and just hanging out with people... we'll see.. hopefully taylor can get back to me so i have a place to stay. SQUEEEEEE i get to see aiden and ness... i deff think ness and i should go to telegraph for old times sake... she's like the only person who can keep up with me when i shop. of course ness will have a say in this... but i deff think that's what we shoudl do
and aiden and i shoudl go to starbucks and chainsmoke like we used to...
wow i'm more excited about what i am doing outside of the con instead of the con...
i had a dream about spencer last night. weird.
i should call sunny or aiden and have them work it out with me so i'm not so freaked.
it was bizarre.
anyhooo i have sewing to do... stupid having to have the shirt done before con...
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| there's no tears cuz he's not here |
[23 May 2005|03:34pm] |
01. reply with your name and i'll write something about you.
02. i'll then tell what songs/movies remind me of you.
03. i will try to name a single word that best describes you.
04. i'll tell you the most memorable moment i've had with you.
05. then i'll tell you my silliest memory of you.
06. i will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. i'll then tell you something that i've always wondered about you.
08. put this in your journal.
*************
so there's this band that i really really love it's one of my guilty pleasures.. even if it is an emo band.. but man.. these guys know what they are doing. they are amazing on cd and indescribeable live... i love them even if i am a dirty little emo kid for listening to them.
and right now i'm listening to one of their albums and... god i wish i had the words to describe this feeling. i feel.... full... sometimes music can do that. it gives me that little extra to make me feel content...
i hate posting about game but this isn't really game related right? (let me fool myself) so i missed game completely this weekend.. and i feel nothing about it... if i missed game i felt a little guilty and upset.. until now.. i wonder if i just go to game out of habit... or if i just need a new concept... i don't really want to deal with the characters... with it all... but i do love the actual rp'ing... i just don't get enough of that. i don't know.. we'll see... my character really has no reason to stay anymore so if i can shelve i will so i can try something else... i just have to get the fabric and such to make the costume... yes i am making a costume for a character.. it's more to get me back into the swing of sewing... that's something i've been doing alot more of lately and enjoying. i'm getting back into fashion which makes me really happy. i got some clothes at the thrift that i want to remake because the fabric is beautiful... this costume tho is gonna totally break me as far as money goes... i need at lease 6 yards of black cotton... owwwwww that's painful.. it'll be awesome tho... and all my other sewing projects are from things i have around the house...
my mother gave me the most beautiful vintage kimono.. i don't think i've willingly taken it off lol. I love it... i find in summer i dress more bohemian.. i really really hate the heat. so i wear lighter layers and more hippie styles.... ah well... come fall i'll be "scene" (as rory says) again.
that reminds me of a memory... ror and kristen and i went to berkeley before xmas last year and they said i made more sense there... i guess it's kinda true... i really miss shopping on telegraph... maybe ness and i can go back there this weekend and catch up like we used to do... i miss my ness and haley so much.. and aiden... and sunny too.. i'm kinda glad she and i are talking again... things have changed and will never be the same but it's nice to finally but the past behind me and just be people together insteadof... well bitter.
so hopefully i'll get to see them this weekend.. btw ness, haley? can i get your #'s so i can call you guys when i'm down there... you can email me at anthem_2_y2k@yahoo.com
thurs/fri i should be getting a cell too.. my mom is picking it up and i'm paying her for it.. well we are splitting it.. it's a prepaid cell but i'm gonna buy her half from her when i can so i'll finally have a cell.. it's just better that way with how little time i spend at home... and i can't really afford a real cell phone with a plan so eh... i'll make it work...
i need a job... i need to get off my ass... blarghy... it's my own damn motivation problem... let's hope i get something soon. after con i'm gonna hit the streets again.. it's what i do.. work hard and then get frustrated and loose hope... but i just gotta get something.
this time is the last time to be here now.
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| ow |
[22 May 2005|05:47pm] |
i'm so sore... i didn't think i was this out of shape.. ah well..
i really sholdn't be updating there isn't alot to say.. i'm a freaking emotional rollercoaster more than usual lately.. poor alex... he get's the brunt of it. he's really patient with me. I just wish he'd know it's not his fault and there's nothing he can really do to fix it. le sigh... nothing i can do about it now...
I may not be going to kublacon.. I have no where to sleep.... which blows. plus i didn't get my sheet forwarded cuz i'm dumb and have been really spacey about game. ah well... we'll see what i can pull off... hopefully i can find somewhere to crash. if you have a floor for me to sleep on i'll love you forever. i'll throw some money at you..... please?
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[19 May 2005|03:45pm] |
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bad day.
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| FUCK! |
[18 May 2005|10:16pm] |
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worried. hurt. angry. concerned. frustrated. forgotten. neurotic.
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| A baby bat Screamed out in fright: "Turn on the dark, I'm afraid of the light" |
[18 May 2005|02:52pm] |
life... i think...
It's interesting how I finally get my life under control... no scratch that... I get my emotional stae regarding life under control.. and everone elses seems to spiral out of control in one way or another... maybe that's too dramtaic a phrasing but I don't want to erase it and think of another.
ah well... I will be gone for about a week and then I will be back and free to be summoned for porchtime, car time and other such things.
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| horoscope for this week... too true. |
[12 May 2005|04:26pm] |
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mood |
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[Caution: Information in this horoscope contains references to exotic sexual practices. If you might be offended, stop reading now. I present this material because you are in a heightened state of arousal, both physically and metaphysically, and could benefit from outrageous provocations as you rethink your approach to intimate acts of love.] The ladybird beetle copulates for up to nine hours at a time, and males may have three 90-minute orgasms in one session. Bonobo apes are not obsessed with orgasm, but have frequent erotic exchanges of every variety, from intercourse to mutual masturbation to oral sex; homosexual contact is common. The male sponge louse disguises himself as a female to aid his seduction strategies. As soon as praying mantises begin coitus, the female bites off the male's head and eats it; sex continues, however. The slime mold comes in 500 genders, and at least 13 of these have to collaborate in order to have a successful mating session.
http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/libra.html
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